The Reject Club
Lincoln wants to join a club, but no one wants him except for the nerds. * episode starts in Royal Woods Elementary School * Lynn Sr.: Panting "Come on, you guys! We're gonna be late!" * Lincoln: "Remind me again why exactly we're at school on a Saturday." * Lynn Sr.: "Are you kidding me? It's club day. It's the only day of the week when I get to hang out with people I really like." * Lincoln, Lily, Lisa, Lola, Lana, Lucy, Lynn, Luan, Luna, Lori and Leni: '''"What?!?" * '''Lynn Sr.: "Uh, uh... Got to go!" * Rita: '"Okay... See you all back here at 5:00." * '''Lincoln: '"But wait! I don't have a club to go to! Well, mom, looks like it's your lucky day. I'm coming with you to your anger-management club." * '''Rita: "Oh, that's sweet, Lincoln, but behind this door, I'm a very different person. Trust me, you don't want to see this." the room * Wilbur Huggins: '"Hello, Rita, welcome to-- Aaauch! Uuuuuh." ''out of the room, screams in pain and exasperatedly passes out * '''Lola: ''the door on the opposite "Could you guys keep it down a little?" * '''Rita:' "You keep it down!!" * Lincoln: "Hey, Lola. What club are you in?" * Lola: "Physics club." * Lincoln: "Well, today's your lucky day, because I--" * Lana: "Let me stop you right there. You know there are different types of intelligence?" * Lincoln: "Yeah." * Lana: "I don't think you have any of them." * Lincoln: "I don't get it." * Lola and Lana: "Exactly." * Lincoln: "Oh, come on!" and Lana slams the door ''"Oh, let me in!" ''grunts "Don't be a club hog!"'' scoffs'' "Fine."to the door of the Fantasy Club room "Dad, can I join your fantasy club?" * Lynn Sr.: from the door curtain scottish accent "Who be there?" * Lincoln: "It's me, Lincoln." * Lynn Sr: "Be you orc?" * Lincoln: '''"No." * '''Lynn Sr: "Be you dwarf?" * Lincoln: "No, I'm your son." * Lynn Sr: "Be you bearer of savory snacks for the elders?" * Lincoln: "What? No." * Lynn Sr: "Then begone!'' the certain.'' * sighs and Lynn walks up. * Lynn: "What's up?" * Lincoln: "Man, there's got to be a club for me somewhere." * Lynn: "You could always join my club." * Lincoln: "What is it?" * cuts to the school swimming pool. * Lynn: "Synchronized swimming!" * Lincoln: "Hmmm. You're good, but I can do better. Here comes the swan dive of eternal beauty!" swan honks * makes a big splash then it starts raining in the swimming pool, then the rain stops, Scene cuts to Lincoln's vision. * Lincoln: sputters "So, how graceful was that?" * Lynn: "Lincoln, you can't swim." * Lincoln: Coughs "Fair point. Uh... has anyone seen my trunks?" * cuts to the changing room * Rocky: "Yeaaah!" * Liam: "Touchdown!" * Rocky: "All right!" * Liam: "Slam-dunk!" * Rocky and Liam: "Yeeaaaahh!" * Lincoln: "Uh, hey guys, is this the Football club?" * Rocky and Liam: '''"Yeeaaahh!" * '''Lincoln: "Well, uh, did I miss the game?" * Liam: "No, it's going on right out there." * Lincoln: "Why aren't you playing?" * Rocky and Liam: "'Cause we're the reserve team!" * Lincoln: "Cool. So, can I join?" * Rocky: "I don't know. Are you man enough?" * Lincoln: scoffs "Me? I'm at least 50% man." * Rocky: "Well, in that case, here's your towel." * Lincoln: "Thanks. So... do you guys ever get to play?" * Rocky: "Nah, we just hang out here and act kinda sporty." * Lincoln: "You guys just take showers, hang around in towels, and high-five each other?" * Rocky: "Heh! There's a little bit more to it than that." * Liam: and hits Lincoln with his skin * Lincoln: "Ah! Ow! Okay! Ow! Okay, okay!" * all begin hitting each other and laughing. * Rocky: "Hey, Giant, is the game over?" * Giant: "Yeah, We lost." swinging his gigantic towel * Rocky and Liam: "Uh oh." * Lincoln: "What?" * hits them with his towel and they all scream. Lincoln walks in pain as he attempts to enter the Tragedy Club room, but the door is quickly locked and the curtain is closed. * Lincoln: "Oh, why doesn't anyone want me in their club? It can't have anything to do with me-- my talent, my intelligence, or my general awesomeness." furious "You know what? Too bad for you jealous people, 'cause I'm starting my own club, and you are not invited." * cuts to Lincoln's Own Club. * Lincoln: "Okay, I'd like to welcome everyone to "Lincoln's Club of Lincoln." First order of business-- attendance. Hmm. Pretty good. Now, it seems like lately we've been let down by certain... family members. So I propose a little exercise in trust. Okay, don't worry, Lincoln. Just close your eyes, let yourself fall back, and someone will catch you." off the glasses and runs on the other side of the room "Well, I'm a bit scared, Lincoln." back and puts on the glasses "Well, that's why it's called a trust exercise. Come on, dude. Give it a spot!" off the glasses and runs forth "Mmm... Okay." and falls backwards, naturally slamming against the floor. He groans in pain, then sighs "All in favor of disbanding the club say, "aye"." hand "Aye. Motion carried." * cuts to Lincoln wandering along the school corrider * Lincoln: "Aw, man, I'm such a reject. I wish there was a club for people like me that no one liked. I'd join that club in a second. I wouldn't even care what it was about." * corridor lamps shut down, and a strange noise echoes through the corridor. * Lincoln: "Uh... what's going on?" * Nerdboy: "Look no further, fellow loser." * Lincoln: "What the?!?" * Nerdboy: "We are the unsought, the weird." * gasps * Nerdboy: "Let me introduce you to..." * whimpers * Nerdboy: "The Reject Club! Always accepting new members." * Lincoln: laughs "Thanks, I'm desperate, but not that desperate." * Nerdboy: "No, wait! We really need new members. We're so bored of talking to each other, we've been phoning up the talking clock for conversation. If you want, you could be our president or something. Or.. or.. or even better, our king! Picture this, Lincoln Loud, king of the rejects!" * Arcade Alien, Devil and Robot: "Eh?" * Lincoln: laughs "What? King of the rejects? Seriously?" laughs "Thanks for the offer, guys, but it's a "no". King of the rejects." away * Devil: "He rejected us." * Robot: "And laughed at our loneliness." * Nerdboy: "Well, we'll see if he's still too good for us when we've finished with him. To the nerd-mobile!" * Reject Club walks like vampires, humming the old Batman theme. Cuts to the Loud House. * Lincoln: "Rejected, even by my own family!" * Rita: "Look, honey, you're not a baby anymore. You need to be able to do things on your own." * Luan: "Oh, there must have been one club that wanted you. laughs * Lana: "Yeah, The Rejects Club." * Lisa: "But I politely declined." * Lori: "Very quick answer." * Lucy: "Well, why don't you take for your club like Lincoln?" * Lincoln: "Nah, it doesn't matter, really." * giggles * Leni: "Maybe I'll just eat on this thing." * brick flies into the dining table * Leni: screams "Oh, it's okay. It landed in the vegetables." brick falls onto the cake, squeezing it "Aaaah! The cake!" * Lori: gasps "Hey, guys! Look! There's a DVD tied to it." * cuts to the living room. * Nerdboy: the DVD recording "Greetings, Lincoln Loud, from our secret lair." * Lola: "Isn't that just the library?" * Luna: "Shh! There's more!" * Nerdboy: the DVD recording "So, you think you're too good for us, eh? Well, you'll soon change your mind when we upload your embarrassing school record in a web video hosted by none other than you." the DVD recording, pretending to be Lincoln "My name is Lincoln Loud and my IQ is smaller than my shoe size. I wore diapers until the age of eleven and once got detention for calling Wilbur Cobb "mum"." * Leni: screams "He looks just like you!" * Nerdboy: the DVD recording "Our revenge plan is almost complete." * Computer: [in the DVD recording "Uploading. Ten minutes until completion." * Nerdboy: the DVD recording laughs "And, cut! How was I? Evil enough?" * Lincoln: "Oh great! Now the nerds are bullying me! I guess you want me to deal with this on my own." * Lori: "No. When someone picks a fight with one of us, they pick a fight with all of us. Everybody, car. We've still got time to stop them." * Leni: "But where is their secret hideout?" * Lisa: "It's in the library." * Leni: "Oh, right. That." * Loud Family rush to the school by car, then they run to the library door. Lori tries to open it, but it's locked. * Lincoln: "Noooo!! It's locked! My reputation is ruined!" * Lori: "No, not yet. Quick-- someone make me angry." * Leni: "Uhhh... I taped a wrestling match over our wedding video?" * Lori: "Rrrrrrrrrgggghhhh!!" * turns Lori to the right and Lori pulls the door open and screams muffled and throws it * Lori: "Go on without me!" as she kicks the locker doors "Ugh! I'm literally out of contro-o-o-o-ol!" the locker doors open and screams ragely * Lily, Lisa, Lola, Lana, Lucy, Lynn, Luan, Luna and Leni run along the library, when Devil, dressed as a wizard, appears in their way. * Devil: "Thou shalt not pass!" * Luna: "You've crossed the wrong wizard, young man! I am level 40! Let's the battle commence!" * and Devil roll their dice * Devil: "Hurrah! I get the first shot. Meteor sword!" * Luna: in pain "Eugh! Ah! Ooh! Eh! He's good, but I can't afford to lose. Magic missle!" * Devil: "Doinggg! Deflected by the Shield of Rampor!" * and Devil roll their dice again * Luna and Devil: gasps "Freeze spell! static * Luna: "Uh! You'll have to go on without me. I'm stuck for the next two turns." * Lily, Lisa, Lola, Lana, Lucy, Lynn, Luan and Leni pass by * Lynn: gasps "Watch out!" * Lily, Lisa, Lola, Lana, Lucy, Lynn, Luan and Leni gasps, the noise is getting louder, Lincoln, Lily, Lisa, Lola, Lana, Lucy, Lynn, Luan and Leni gasps again, The noise turns out to be from Robot. * Lincoln: sighs "Relax. it's only a robot. I can take him." * Robot: "Initiating combat mode." into a giant robot * Lily, Lisa, Lola, Lana, Lucy, Lynn, Luan and Leni screams. * Lola: "Don't worry, guys. I got this." sliding her feet on the floor * Lincoln: "What are you doing?" * Lola: "Leave it to me. Just go around him." * Lincoln: "Are you sure you're gonna be okay?" away with Lynn * Lola: "Don't worry. The power of physics has never failed me yet." * slowly steps toward Lola, but Lola zaps him in the leg, causing him to fall unconscious. * Arcade Alien: "I'm gonna get that baby." * is walking and Arcade Alien got Lily Loud. * Arcade Alien: "I got you now!" * [Lily is farting at Arcade Alien.] * Arcade Alien: '"Eww! Gross!" * '''Lily: '"Poo-poo!" and walking around * throws a science project at Arcade Alien and explodes at Arcade Alien. * 'Lisa: '"And that was the only protection of the scientific project of me. Especially, I was gonna see it." winks * sees the computer. * '''Lincoln: "The computer! This is our chance to stop the upload." * Computer: "30 seconds to completion." * appears, holding a ruler * Lynn: gasps "There's a guard!" * is imitating lightsaber noises * Lynn: "That guy looks pretty dangerous." * Lincoln: "What are we gonna do?" * Lynn: "Leave it to me. Come on, punk." * Nerdboy: "Huh?" * Lynn: "Let's dance." on the jukebox and begins dancing * Nerdboy: gasps "Such grace! The rhythm... must... synchronize!" * Lincoln: "Thanks, buddy." at the computer * Computer: "5 seconds to completion." * Lincoln: "Yes! My reputation is safe. Now it's time to cancel this uploaded video." * Computer: "4 seconds to completion." * Alien grabs Lincoln's head, Lincokn screams and attempts to grab the mouse * Computer: "3 seconds. 2 seconds. 1 second 'til completion. Upload complete." * Lincoln: "NOOOOOOO!!!!!!" * Computer: "Sending to all school contacts." * Nerdboy: computer video recording, pretending to be Lincoln "My name is Lincoln Trisha Loud. That's right, Trisha is my middle name, and I was born without eyebrows and have to draw them on every day. On hot days I smell like pate and teachers are advised not to mention it. Also, I have a glandular problem that causes-" * Lincoln: "Okay! Okay, you win. I'll join your club." * Nerdboy: "Are you kidding? Have you seen your school record? We're desperate, but we're not that desperate."and walks away with the Reject Club * Lincoln: sighs "Great. Rejected by the Reject Club." * cuts to the highway * Lincoln: "Well, that's my reputation ruined until college." * Luna: "No, it isn't. I counter-hacked the main school server and rerouted the e-mail before it got anyone." * Lucy: "Oh, thank you, sis." * Lisa: "Don't worry. We'll always be there for you." * Lola: "You're part of the Loud club... Trisha." * Lincoln: "Yeah, and whose great idea was that?" * Lynn Sr.: "What's wrong with it? It's short for "Tristopher"." * Rita: "Honey, I thought we agreed on "Christopher." * Leni: "Christopher, Tristopher-- same thing, right?" * Lynn: "So, what shall we do with these guys?" * Rita: "Well, I think the responsible thing to do would be to drive them home and tell their parents what they've done." * Reject Club shakes their heads in disagreement. * Lori: "No? Then how about we spray you in honey and drop you off in the bear cage at the zoo?" * Reject Club, again, disagrees to the idea. * Leni: "Okay, like, maybe you'd prefer to be dropped off naked at the mall?" * Reject Club considers the idea, then nods their heads. * Lincoln: "All those in favor, say "aye"." * Lily, Lisa, Lola, Lana, Lucy, Lynn, Luan, Luna, Leni, Lori, Rita and Lynn Sr.: "Aye!" * Lincoln: "Motion carried." * episode ends. ''''Trivia * This is a fanfiction episode is based on The Amazing World of Gumball episode "The Club". * Nerdboy says "Wilbur Cobb". This is a character mention of The Ren & Stimpy Show. Category:Episodes